Hearing Things

First off, and completely off subject, I want to give a huge shout-out to Tyler Melhart who has done the cover art of both Beginnings and The Ferryman, not to mention the cover for my upcoming release of The Burden of Immortality. He's also working on new covers for my series Jeremiah Stone (newly renamed the Stone Vengeance series) which I plan to republish shortly. He deserves a lot of applause for putting up with my demands. Thanks.

Now back to the point of this post. So this is going to sound odd to a few of you, suspicious to most, and just plan crazy to a lot of you, but it's something that's been on my mind for a few days now though this occurred over a week ago. Anyways, though people may not know it, I'm a religious man. I don't often demonstrate this, but if asked then I will answer truthfully with my belief. It is also something I will not argue because I hold this internally and my thoughts (though they stray at times) only cement my belief. So just to be sure everyone understands, I believe what I believe, I don't push my beliefs on others, and I respect that my body is truly a temple of (and for) god. Most of all, I will not say my beliefs are any better than another persons. Yet, it is also due to my beliefs that causes religion becomes a center point of my writing. That being said, I can now continue.

A week or so ago, I was reminiscing over my book The Burden of Immortality, contemplating life and all its vastness, and wondering if there is a beyond. To some these are fatalistic thoughts, or even hearsay, but to me these are just the processes of my wandering mind and over-active imagination. However, unlike most times, these thoughts occupied me for more than just a few minutes or few hours, but rather a few days. When I was done, and believe me when I say I was done I was done, I simply continued with life without another thought, though in all this time I'd not come to a resolution. In fact, I'd discovered nothing. I felt empty for having wasted so much time and thought, yet had come away from it all unfulfilled. Moreover, if anything, I was less of myself at the end than when I started. This is odd for me because I seek meaning in what I do. Still, I left it as it be, and just started life again.

Then several hours later, while driving down a street near my house with nothing but the road on my mind, I heard a voice in my head. First of all, I know right now you're thinking I'm crazy and for that second I have to agree with you. But in that moment, I analyzed everything around me; the softness of the radio in the background, the noise of the cars around me, and even my own thoughts. What I discovered was none of those things were the cause of what I'd heard. In fact, despite my immediate denial of what the voice said, I knew I'd heard the divine. But I also knew I'd never hear it again (well, most likely never hear it again). Yet, what I heard lifted my spirit, it brought meaning back into my life. Most of all, however, it re-established, in an odd way, that my religious belief was good and what I was doing was good. It provided meaning.

Now, I'm not the best person around. I have huge character flaws. I have deviated from the beliefs of my youth more than I like to admit. And I'm not the nicest person to have at your side. Despite this, I try to be a good person. I try to do the right thing. I try to help others. And in my belief, this wins out (most of the time). Anyway, what I heard within my head has supplied me with something I could not have gotten from some one or some place else. This is even more relevant when I take into consideration the single word I heard in a voice as non-descript, yet overwhelmingly positive, as any I've ever heard in my life.

I am now going to pass that word on to you, the word I heard which I can't explain from where it came, and a word which now brings a refreshed smile to my face. So I say in a friendly tone, just as it was said to me, 'Hi'.