Wandering a Circular Path

Previously, I've written things which spur emotions or challenge the norm or skew our perspectives on life. I've written of heroes and villains and men in between. I've written of women both fragile and strong. I've even written of the inane or scribbled out thoughts without a clear purpose until something twists within my mind giving them meaning. Lately, however, I write nothing; not like I used too.

My writing has switched to editing which doesn't conjure the imagination, but only turns it toward an already defined purpose. It’s the fault of not being a perfect writer, though I doubt anyone writes perfectly the first time. It also doesn't help that I type slower than I think therefore I'm prone to make mistakes. I wish to dedicate some effort to become better, but only time will tell if I'm truly successful or not.

Then there are times I want to write, but the opportunity escapes me like a raindrop in the fog because by the time I final grasp the ending I've forgotten the beginning.  Sometimes it’s simply because I don’t have anything available to write on or with which seems to be the primary reason of late. But what I notice the most is that because I’m not exercising my imagination with new things, I find my thoughts wandering more freely at the most inopportune times. I struggle to remember those instances of creativity, but they are often ghost in the night while haunting images prod thoughts of what would've been, could've been.

I should learn to put my time to better use.

In the near future, I hope to have that time. I've just completed final edits on Limbus and am reviewing the final write-up of Azazel. By the holidays, I shall be finished and free which brings me back to my own need for creativity.

I have books I want to work on; new books, exciting books. Books that twist and stretch my abilities, but they are not for me, not yet. I also have books written which need editing, though editing gets me back into the realm of the inane. Then there is Burden; the book I began nearly a year ago and have put aside. I've done some recent thinking on this project and have not picked it up for months because I've not liked where its headed, but I think that’s about to change. In my contemplation of dislike over my progress, I think I've found a fix. I can change the story, alter the last chapter, and present a clearer, more concise context for the main character’s choices. This will make his desperation to pursue the ultimate goal far more decisive which is what I believe the story has lacked to this point.

Having said that, I hope to dust off the file, reboot the character, and once again let my imagination take flight with only an end goal in mind. I can’t want to see what I can come up with once my creative juices get flowing again. Wish me luck.